Are Mothers Saints? The Uncanonized Teachers Among Us
How mothers shape our moral compass with split-second decisions
Here’s why I think mothers are under-appreciated. Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers out there, by the way.
In religious instruction growing up, a lot was made of the “company of saints.” Looking at the Encyclopedia of Saints or the Book of Saints, we see many people who dedicated their lives to spreading goodness around them.
However, I think there’s another, under-appreciated side of the coin. That’s mothers. People who raise their children with love and care, and nurture human values. And the sum of all mothers throughout time has done so much to create a better world that I don’t think it’s possible for us to realize. Can we even imagine a world with them? Who would want to?
I remember a time my mother taught me a key lesson about kindness. I was probably 12 or so, and seated in the back seat of the car on the way to church, blindly chatting. As we rolled through the church parking lot, I called someone a bad name. I didn’t even know what the word meant at the time. But it was bad. My mom hit the brakes so hard that I flew slightly forward only to see her whip around from the front seat. “We do not use that word.” It left a visceral memory in my gut and drilled in a point.
I haven’t insulted someone in that way since then. And it wasn’t just a lesson in courtesy, but in how we treat people.
There are many big lessons we can learn only from our teachers, from philosophers, gurus, pastors, and deep thinkers. But there are things we have learned, that have been ingrained in us thanks to our mothers.
In India, there’s a saying that your first guru, or teacher, is your parents. It’s an idea that’s made more sense over time.
There were many teaching moments in my family, not all of which I appreciated (this is part of the tragedy of childhood, not being able to fully see your parents till those years have passed). But as I’ve grown older, I can look back and see how each of these lessons was like a bead, which has been strung together to make me who I am; like nudges on a ship’s bow to steer it toward better waters.
What was one learning from your mother that you’ve grown to appreciate over time?
Thank you for asking. Happy Holiday! Mom asked me to sit and craft once in awhile. In thanks to God, all mankind, Earth, space ,and consciousness, to create. Love the sunlight shining through the clear bead like smoky quartz dispelling confusion upon the busy desk. Love the purpose of the wooden bead all living things could enjoy as a reminder to delight in everyday drops. In small ways forever hold on to infinite manifestation.
How I respond to challenges. she taught me the value of what she would term as ‘presence of mind’. I remember her again and again at various points in life whenever I hit what I perceived as a ‘major problem’ she would always sit me down and tell me to be keep my calm instead of freaking out (which was my go to! I would just start crying) she would say you must have presence of mind specially in these times. Freaking out is just not helpful. Be calm, think deeply about the challenge, really see what’s truly happening and focus on the solution. She turned problems in to a creative pursuit and generously rewarded a novel solution!!